15 Bitching and Moaning

[gladiolusinpurple]

Just when I think I've heard every complaint under the sun and moon, I receive a call from an angry guest on our most prestigious floor:

Two little birds were having sex on his balcony.

Between randy wildlife and the cicada onslaught, I suppose it's about time I got around to harnessing the power of nature. I'm going to be a busy boy from here on.

-

I already told one little bird big blue birdie, I suppose I should share with the rest. I'll be playing bass guitar with some friends for the opening of a drag show in 2-chome. If you want to come, contact me to avoid that cover, ne?

Comments

[wildlionchef]

How on Earth does he except you to deal with that sort of thing?

[gladiolusinpurple]

Summoning the wrath of the earth, I suppose? He must have been disappointed when I shooed them off with a towel.

[oshitariy]

With the use of little birds--literal and figurative--in this post, it almost sounds like you're trying to accuse me of having sexy times on your hotel balcony.

[gladiolusinpurple]

I apologize, a case of mistaken identity. I fixed the error to clear your good name.

If you do ever have sex on the hotel balcony though, make sure that the room belongs to you and that your room doesn't face the street :)

[oshitariy]

Ah yes, thank you for the correction. I do see the resemblance.

I will keep that in mind for future reference.

[gladiolusinpurple]

Beautiful, you should make a Tinder for that sexy picture on the left ♥

(ooc: HAHAHAHAHA BIG BLUE BIRD <3 )

[oshitariy]

I really should, shouldn't I. Ask if anyone wants to come fluff my feathers, or a nice peck(ing) on the lips.

I may actually do this, as I am terribly bored.

[gladiolusinpurple]

But who could resist such a pecker?

If you're so terribly bored, come do it at the hotel bar. Share the entertainment.

[oshitariy]

I may be tempted to start making a second home at the hotel, with how frequently I've been visiting. But yes, I will be there in a jiffy.

[gladiolusinpurple]

Hmm, as long as you don't touch my shoe closet, feel free to stay whenever you'd like. I'm on nights half the time time anyway so the bed misses company.

We have subscriptions for all the best movies.

[oshitariy]

I would never! I solemnly swear to faithfully keep your bed warm and stay within arms distance of your shoe closet, as long as you promise me that the reason I can't open your shoe closet is for reasons other than supernatural activity.

Yes, yes you do have all the best movies. I have gratefully been in the care of your movies and tissue stock.

[gladiolusinpurple]

I promise, no skeletons in my closet. Just freshly organized shoes!

Thank you for keeping my room nice and warm for when I return ♥

[oshitariy]

Anything for you, love. ♥

[atoberex]

When will this concert be? If I am available, I will show my support, of course.

[gladiolusinpurple]

The Friday after next.

Let's go shopping to pick out a dress for you!

[atoberex]

You are *not* suggesting I wear something off the rack, are you?

[oshitariy]

Oh. But you are doing the thing? :>

[gladiolusinpurple]

Merely for inspiration. Then you can have something made ♥

[kabajim]

Perhaps you should tell your guest the story of the birds and the bees?

Is this like the shows back in high school?

[gladiolusinpurple]

I won't lie, I was awfully tempted.

On a much bigger scale, Kabaji-kun! And well, I didn't have the guts to wear a dress in public (outside of silly things, like school cafes) until college.

[kabajim]

I would like to attend, if I can. I'm sure you will be very pretty.

What kind of music will you be playing?

[gladiolusinpurple]

Of course, I'll get you a ticket.

Rock! And well, I slipped in a country song or two shhh.

[inuibuchou]

Hm. You never did answer my question about the available room. I did mention the expense account. I assure you that I will not call for you to shoo away anything.

You play the guitar? Ii data...

[gladiolusinpurple]

I apologize! I could've sworn I replied to that. My head must be out with the birds with excitement from the number 539...

Of course, we can accommodate you. I promise to even be kind to your expense account. ;)

I play the bass guitar.

(ooc: Sorry, that was my bad! I didn't properly add him to my friends list for some reason :/ Fixed now!)

[inuibuchou]

You are forgiven, of course. Birds can be quite distracting.

I appreciate it. I am in some desperate need of some pampering. You have a masseuse on site, but I've been sleeping on very hard surfaces. Does he have an assistant or a colleague he can call when he gets tired?

Ah, the "sexy" instrument of the rock world. Ii data.

[gladiolusinpurple]

Thank you.

Don't worry, poor dear. We have a team of masseuses on site.

Of course ;)

[somewhereibelong]

Uhh... Since I'm not getting involved with Keigo's apparent acceptance of wearing a damn dress... Just to make sure... You don't HAVE to wear one? Do you...? I'd really, really, REALLY like to avoid that...

[gladiolusinpurple]

Of course not. If you don't want to come in drag, just bring your dashing self as is :)

[somewhereibelong]

I really don't want to...

[gladiolusinpurple]

Then don't ♥

[gekidazejanai]

How formal is this shindig?

[gladiolusinpurple]

Not particularly. Wear whatever you like, I'm sure you will look wonderful.

[gekidazejanai]

Oh good, I can just wear some nice pants and a nice shirt, then. I can handle that one.

[gladiolusinpurple]

I have a hard time believing that you couldn't handle a dress. All the same, do wear what makes you feel good and comfortable.

[gekidazejanai]

I'm sure I could, but I don't own one. I own nice pants and nice shirts, though.

[gladiolusinpurple]

If you'd like to try, you're more than welcome to my closet ♥

[gekidazejanai]

Do you think we're the same size?

[gladiolusinpurple]

With a few adjustments, I have no doubt that certain garments will be just fine.

[gekidazejanai]

Mm, I could be convinced. Would it be easier for me to come to you, or the other way around?

[gladiolusinpurple]

Come to me, dear. We'll do lunch and dress up. Of course, your sweetheart should come too!

[gekidazejanai]

Sweetheart? Do you mean Arashi? I'm not dating anyone.

(Ooc: yes, he is clueless.)

[gladiolusinpurple]

Yes, I meant Arashi!

[gekidazejanai]

Then why didn't you say so? Does Saturday work? I have the weekend off, so I'll have lots of time.

[gladiolusinpurple]

I thought it was obvious!

Saturday suits me just fine.

[gekidazejanai]

Promise you'll ignore her if she insists I dress as Elsa?

[gladiolusinpurple]

Am I ever not on your side, Shishido ♥

(ooc: ...note that this is not a yes)

[gekidazejanai]

Is that rhetorical?

(ooc: he suspects as much)

[gladiolusinpurple]

If you'd like it to be.

[gekidazejanai]

I really wouldn't. I mean, I'm not even a blond, so it wouldn't work out in the first place.